If someone close to you is gambling too much, you can help, and you can get support yourself. You cannot make them stop, but you can talk calmly, protect your money and look after your own wellbeing. Every service on this page is open to family and friends.
How do I know if someone has a gambling problem?
Gambling can be easy to hide. The NHS lists signs of gambling harm, including chasing losses, borrowing money or selling things to gamble, financial problems for the household, and criticism from other people about the gambling. You may notice:
- money going missing or bills going unpaid,
- secrecy about phones, cards or accounts,
- sudden mood changes, stress or anxiety,
- time away from home that is hard to explain, and
- arguments about money.
Any one of these can have other causes. See the full list of warning signs.
How should I talk to them?
- Choose a calm moment. Not straight after an argument or a loss.
- Talk about what you have seen. “I’ve noticed the rent was missed and I’m worried” works better than “You have a problem.”
- Avoid blame and shame. Gambling problems are not a sign of weakness or bad character.
- Listen first. You may not get a decision in the first conversation. That is normal.
- Mention support. You can say that free, confidential help exists and offer to look at it together.
GAMSTOP says that bringing up self-exclusion “might be a difficult conversation,” but it could also be just what they need to hear.
What should I do about money?
Gambling problems often become money problems for the whole household.
- Protect your own money. Consider separate accounts and keep control of your own savings, cards and passwords.
- Do not pay off gambling debts in secret. It can hide how serious things are and allow the gambling to continue.
- Do not lend money “one last time”. Offer to help find support instead.
- Get debt advice for the household if you need it. National Debtline offers free, confidential advice in England and Wales on 0808 808 4000.
Can I register someone with GAMSTOP?
No. GAMSTOP says you must not register someone else. The only exception is where you are lawfully authorised, for example by holding a valid power of attorney. The person has to choose it for themselves.
You can register yourself. GAMSTOP says this stops your details being used by someone else to open or use online gambling accounts. See how GAMSTOP works.
How do I look after myself?
Gambling affects the people around the gambler too, and your needs matter.
- Speak to someone you trust, or to a helpline, about how you are.
- Join a group for people in your situation (see below).
- Keep up the routines and friendships that keep you well.
- Ask for help with stress, anxiety or low mood from your GP.
What about children?
Children notice tension even when nobody explains it. Keep routines steady and tell them, in simple words, that the problem is not their fault. Under-18s who are worried about their own gambling have a separate route through GamCare. Services are listed on our help page.
Where can families get help?
- National Gambling Helpline (GamCare): 0808 8020 133. Free and open 24/7. You can call about a friend or family member. You do not have to give your name, and the call stays confidential unless someone is in immediate risk.
- GamCare online community: forum, chatrooms and MyGamCare, a space to connect with others.
- Gam-Anon: meetings for anyone affected by a loved one’s gambling, such as partners, children, siblings and friends. Details at gamanon.org.uk.
- NHS gambling clinics (England): the NHS says clinics can support family or friends. The National Problem Gambling Clinic says friends and family affected by someone else’s gambling can also get support.
- GamFam and Gambling with Lives: the NHS lists these for people affected by someone else’s gambling, including those bereaved by gambling-related suicide.
- Samaritans: 116 123, free, if you need to talk about how you are feeling.
If anyone is in danger, call 999.
See also the self-check if you want to share it with them, and how to cut down or stop.